Sandi: I have been married for seven years and wife was a virgin when we married. She was never a particularly sexual person and I am the complete opposite. I feel sexual energy running rampant in all aspects of my life. I adore my wife but plainly stated she is an awful kisser, gives terrible blow jobs, and simply is no fun in bed. I can’t say that to her, but she just doesn’t seem to have the instincts to be great at sex. What can I do to make our time together better without hurting her feelings?
Thanks for your help, Joe
Communication, as always is the key. You need to make it all about her, I’m sure she already realizes (we’re not as stupid as most guys think) that there is a problem. Pamper her, buy her flowers (Ted buys me flowers EVERY week, when we’re not living on the boat and look what that gets him 🙂 , treat her like the special person that she is and in turn, she just might treat you the same.
Then you need to gently guide her, which may put her off at times, but I’m sure she understands that all men (and women) are different when it comes to sex. Some like blow jobs with hand strokes and others don’t. Some like it fast and others like it slow and hard. Showing her how it feels best doesn’t mean she is doing it wrong; you’re just showing her what feels best for you.You may want to take a chance and buy this Blow Job book (which is a tasteful guide on how to give Mind-Blowing Blow Jobs). And while you are at it, check out Lick by Lick (how to go down on a woman and have her begging for more)… talk about getting Better at Sex.
During sex, use your hands and move her hips where you want her, and ask her to do the same to you. Again, you just have to take control, which many women find exciting, especially in bed. Kissing is easy. Tell her to be still and let you do all the work. Many times this will show her how you like to kiss and she will mimic you. BUT, whatever you do, don’t start treating her special today, buy her flowers tomorrow and expect the sex to magically get better overnight, it took seven years for her to reach the asexual situation she is in today. It may take years to turn her around, but if you can, hold on, you could be in for a hellova ride! …Sandi