The Fine Art of the Threesome

Some people like to take their time and test the waters before plunging in. Not me. I like to dive right in. Head first. That was how I got my first “taste” of the lifestyle and I’ve been hooked ever since.

It’s been 10 years since my first threesome, but I can remember it like it was yesterday. I answered an ad in a swinger’s personals magazine (just like the site you are looking at with your beady little eyes right now). A young couple was looking for a stud to fire up their fantasy of a threesome. And that stud turned out to be me (being a stud comes naturally when you’re 25 years old, I have to work a little harder at it now). I can still remember the nervous excitement and the sheer thrill of actually being in a threesome after fantasizing about it for years.

What a rush.

Even though it’s been many years since my first experience in swinging, the thrill is still the same. The nervous anticipation leading up to the first meeting (Will they like me? Will I like them?), the horny rush of excitement when you know “it’s on”, and, of course, all the good times that follow.

Before You Meet For Your Threesome

Regardless of whether you are a single looking for a couple or a couple looking for a single, before you meet with someone you should take the time to realistically decide what type of people you are looking for.

Not an issue with you, you say? You just want to meet horny people. Let me give you an example. I was chatting (online) with a hot couple that I met through an earlier version of this site. Everything was looking good and we decided to meet. One last question though before we hop in the sack. The husband asked, “you’re bi right?” Uh, no. That was a deal-breaker. But better to find out while I was safely seated behind my computer than when I was in a more compromising position (as much as I enjoy mounting women the thought of being mounted myself is not high on my list of things to do). All the power to those who do enjoy that, but it is just not for me.

Here is another tip, ask for a recent photo. I just met a couple that was in from out of town on vacation. We had chatted via email and exchanged pictures prior to their arrival. I was quite anxious to meet this couple since the woman was gorgeous and had a stunning body. When I walked into the bar to finally meet them I almost didn’t recognize them (even though they were the only couple in the place). The picture they sent me must have been at least 10 years old. And even though the woman still had the same gorgeous face (albeit 10 years older than in her picture) she had gained about 50 pounds since then. They turned out to be a very nice couple and, even though we did have a great time together, I did feel a bit deceived.

Meeting Threesome Partners

So you’ve decided that you want to have a threesome; now what? Where do you find that perfect person to flesh out the fantasy of your first (or next) threesome? Right here, of course. Swingers websites are a great place to meet others.

Another option is to go to a swing club or a “swing friendly club”.

Allow me to explain the difference. A swing club is just that, a private membership club that caters to swingers. You can be sure that when you walk into a swing club everyone is there for the same reason.

A “swing friendly club”, however, is a club (generally a bar) that happens to be a hangout for swingers. On any given night some (or most) of the people in there will be swingers. But since this is a public establishment it’s a safe bet that there are a few non-swingers in there as well. The trick is figuring out who is the swinger and who isn’t.

After You Meet / Threesome Etiquette

  1. If you are a single joining a couple, understand that it is a privilege to be invited to play on their “turf”. Be respectful of that fact.
  2. Leave your “hang-ups” at home. I asked one couple to tell me what turns them off when looking for a single to join them in a threesome. They said, “A complainer. We had an experience with someone that went through a bad divorce. All the person did was speak ill about the ex and whine about being divorced.”
  3. Share the fun. Sex is not a race to see who can cum first (guys, I’m talking to you now). Slow down and enjoy the whole experience. When speaking with another couple about what they dislike in a partner, they were in agreement about this topic, “A selfish lover. Someone that is just there for their own pleasure and doesn’t think or care about the others in the threesome having a good time.” A threesome is a “team” sport; make sure that everyone gets a chance to play.
  4. Meet on neutral ground. Under no circumstances should you invite someone that you don’t know to your home. Meet at a local bar or coffee shop first and spend a few minutes (at least) getting to know the person or people.
  5. Always bring protection. Save the unprotected sex for your committed relationship. When you are playing in the lifestyle never ride “bareback” (without a condom). The risks are just too high.

Whether you are working up the nerve to experience your first threesome or are just trying to find warm bodies for your next threesome, play safe, have fun and always leave them smiling.

Major Mojo is a writer and swinger living in Virginia Beach, VA. Over the years he has written for many Swingers Magazines as well as Swingers websites, and is now swinging single.

Until next time, Happy Swinging!

~Major Mojo
(Virginia Beach, VA)

You can also learn more about having a Threesome by reading Suzy Bauer?s excellent book which will give you a step by step look at Threesomes.

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